I don’t feel I know very much tonight…
I’ve not been well with a virus, the fibro flared up, and now I feel tired and – to be perfectly honest, which I do always try to be – quite soul-weary.
But I do know this. I know that I lay in my favourite public garden again today, this time with my ever-wonderful husband, and I looked up at the pattern of the sky through the lacing of branches and green leaves, and I felt nature living and breathing around me. And I know that it felt like nature has something right that I’ve somehow lost along the way. A natural ability to thrive, regenerate, heal, and rebalance itself (when we humans don’t get in the way).
And I realise I’m done looking to external sources to fix me. I’m done maybe even seeking “healing”. I’ve been going for years and really no one can accuse me of not trying hard enough. I’m weary, and I’ve been trying too hard all my life – at everything.
I’m done with trying. I’m looking to the trees now. Like them, I’m staying still, but I’m reaching out to the heavens. I’m open to everything the Universe has to offer me.
But I’m not trying anymore.
New mum, old soul... Finding beauty, wisdom, spirituality, and opportunities for learning in the everyday (hopefully)...